Episode 167: The Entrepreneur’s Dilemma: When to Ditch the Expert’s Rules
Building a business isn't linear - it's the process of many small decisions affecting future outcomes. Most of us are willing learners when it comes to growing our business. But what if parts of an expert's strategy doesn't sit right (even though you diligently try to make it work)?
What if you were called to be a trailblazer?
One of the most supportive (and freeing) ways you can grow your business is to think outside of the box.
In this episode, I share how trying to fit what I paid to learn wasn't landing, and how I decided to blaze my own trail.
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Episode Transcript:
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Welcome back entrepreneurs to another Fem Nation podcast episode. I'm so glad you're here today. As you'll notice, again, there is no intro in outro. I mentioned it on the last episode, and I figured I would probably dive into it just a little bit more for you here. Only because, only because there's a bigger reason, there's a bigger storyline behind it. And I wanted to include you on how I navigate this entrepreneurial space and why it matters. So let's just spend a little bit of time together on that today. The reason I don't have an intro and outro, two reasons I would say. One is that whatever is current, whatever is being told or taught or suggested or the status quo, I love to bend it. I love to bend away from that.
(01:10):
And two, I fast forward on the podcast as I listen to, I fast forward the intro and I never catch the outro. And I don't have any desire to monetize this podcast, to have advertisers or a spot for them, you know, just a spot that's paid contribution from someone. It just doesn't feel aligned for me. And so I don't really ever consider that I'm gonna have that. The future can change indeed. But at the same time, it just is not something that I'm, I've played with, I've toyed with, and definitely not something that I really have ever felt called to do with this particular podcast. Now, the podcast started out almost three years ago. Goodness gracious. Two, two years ago, I'm gonna have to do, Boy, I'm gonna have to look back. It's been a minute and this little pause this year between giving it a moment for a break and then also coming back and reigniting it in October, definitely set the timeline differently.
(02:16):
But the last couple years, the timeline's just been different, period. So I don't remember 2019, 3 years has been three years. That being said, originally I started this journey for a couple of reasons, because I wanted to highlight the stories. I wanted to learn the stories. I wanted to listen to the stories of hundreds of women entrepreneurs. I wanted to know how they operated, what was important to them. Had very unscripted conversations, unscripted questions. Some of them were similar, but it wasn't necessary to ask one versus the other or have a set number of questions to ask. The reason I did it that way is because I wanted the conversation to be absolutely organic and all podcasts out there at that time. When I started that jour, the journey, then it had a structure and a strategy, and I didn't want that. I wanted it to be a little bit different.
(03:21):
I wanted it to feel more conversational and more kitchen table or coffee talk type of environment. I just didn't want the status quo. I was bending it then. And also, I didn't feel like I knew what I was called to do with the podcast. A hundred percent. And that's also why there was a pause this year of about eight, eight to nine months, is because I needed to step away from it becoming a chore to set up the interviews, interview the people. And don't get me wrong, every single one of the interviews, I always walked away and loved it. But the moment that it started feeling like it was something that it was just on my to-do list, was the moment I needed to slow down reexamine and see where it was disconnecting, where it was starting to disconnect and where I wasn't following my passion, following the purpose or my vision.
(04:26):
And so that was about the tail end of, of last year with the podcast. And a lot of things shifted as I've shared before. And so it was a natural break as well as a needed break for the podcast. But I didn't want to come back to it. I didn't want to bring life to it again, just to create one more thing for me to check the box. One more thing for me to do. I knew that the next iteration, the next season per se, although I'm not listing them as seasons, but the next season, per se of the podcast was going to be more solo episodes, more, more me. And when, when was the big question, I thought maybe in June I was going to reignite it, but this summer was not the summer for that. But I knew it needed to be free.
(05:21):
This podcast, the vision I have for the podcast, the conversation, really the lifeline between you and I needed to have its own life. And I wasn't giving it that. Initially, I went through 165 episodes on the first couple years of the podcast, and those episodes were all interviews. I got to understand so many ways of doing business. So many industries, so many challenges, successes, and all of the things that come along with it. I listened to, to hundreds of stories. And some of 'em were, were amazing. Some of them were heartbreaking, some of them were difficult. Some of the journey since I recorded with a guest interview, a woman entrepreneur has changed a lot. Their lives have changed too, and I'm still connected with, gosh, I'm pretty sure most all of them, but some of them aren't in business anymore. Some of 'em have shifted their business.
(06:28):
Some of them have stepped away temporarily. A a lot of different scenarios as the needs arise. But the reason for this episode is because I don't want you to go into this entrepreneurial journey or be in the heart of your entrepreneurial journey, being so married to someone else's methodology or strategy that you can't make decisions for your own business. I fell down that rabbit hole so hard. I have shared that I've invested quite a bit in this digital online business world. And every time I would do that, it was a course or a mastermind or a membership or that each time it was learning a bit of strategy. And, and don't forget, a lot of my background had heavy training in the logical analytical, knowing that I'm a creative as well. It's been a polarizing I'd say internal fight for, is creative gonna live and throw logic out the window, or is logic going to live so that, you know, it makes head sense, but my heart and my creativity go out the window.
(07:52):
What is going to be ultimately the vision of my business, my entrepreneurial journey? And so when I would learn and when I would invest, and when I would go in and hack the backside of someone else's system and, and save their emails and their marketing campaigns, and understanding the funnel sequencing and understanding tagging and understanding nurturing sequences, you know, getting to know every ounce of what draws people in. And, and I'm a consumer and I'll even know I'm being targeted and I'll, I'll buy something because it caught my attention mostly. But and it was an interesting, you know, it would be an interesting investment, not necessarily one that I knew, but if there was something that was in the marketing or in the copywriting or in the conversation that really intrigued me, I'd say, Okay, let me, let me, let me purchase this to see what this person's like. Let me see what this expert is like in this industry.
(08:55):
And so with all of that, I would go in and I would learn their system. I would hack the system. I would see what email led to what, and I would follow the sequence and I would see how their course or their, their membership or their mastermind or their, their weekend v i p whatever I was investing in, I would go in and I would look at all the back of it. What were all the components and the pieces and the, the data and the analytics, What did all that look like? And I'd reverse engineer it. And I mean, gosh, I'm literally a master at doing that at this point because I've done it so many times. It just comes second nature anymore. But that coupled with our rapidly evolving digital knowledge space businesses makes that nearly impossible to follow someone's method or strategy at this point. And ultimately, what I want to guide you back towards is that you have so much power that you are giving away to experts or so-called experts. Some of them are not experts, some claim to be, and they're, and they're not. But you're giving your power away to them and forsaking your business mind to be able to make decisions that are prudent for you. And lemme give you an example.
(10:27):
I at one point invested in a group model coaching small group. Mind you, I was never really one for the big groups that it just wasn't one, wasn't my jam, even as good as the content would be. It's just not, was not my thing. And so I just, I knew that early on and I would gravitate towards a kind of a smaller room. And the methodology, I paid good money for this container of this time. This group coaching timeframe and the teaching behind it, solid teaching. I'm, I will say, and an side note on this, I don't ever want anyone to think I'm knocking anybody's methodology. That's not the case here. And I'll explain a little bit of that in a minute. But learning the methodology, applying all of the things, at some point, I wouldn't apply them. And at the early stages of my learning curve in this industry, but for this particular program, I paid enough that it was a pain point for me to not do the work, right?
(11:33):
And so there's value in that. Just remember that when you're building your business or building, you know, creating opportunities to work with you in different containers, that definitely moved the needle for me. I wasn't going to pay what I paid for that particular learning opportunity and not do the work. But it's also, I trusted, trusted the process that this person was teaching. I absolutely trusted the methodology I trusted cuz I could see, I had watched for two years prior I had read the content, I had followed the testimonials. I had even linked out to who was sending the testimonial, typing them up and looking at them to see if, if the results were founded. You know, I looked, I, I investigate. So I trusted this mentor's capacity that the methodology was sound.
(12:32):
So I put all the pieces together, but there were several, several pieces inside of it and I was like, yeah, hmm, this one's not ringing a bell for me. But I didn't try to dive into it much. I'm learning the process here. I'm applying, I'm putting my strategy hat on and saying, do the work. Don't overthink this, do the work. Don't overthink this. And there's nothing wrong with that. As long as you are aware that if it continues to nag you internally or, or poke you internally or just has an uneasiness internally on part of the methodol methodology, that doesn't mean that it's not sound or that part of it is not sound. It just means that that's not part for you because as well intentioned, as verifiable and as beautiful someone else's methodology can be, it's their methodology. There is not a single person, not a single business in this digital creative space across any industry that has any digital, anything that has the number one ultimate methodology that is unified and works across the board.
(13:59):
No one has that. And trust me when I say I have looked for it, I have searched for that universal, you know, pill that if I just follow this, this will come about or if I just follow this, that'll come about, I should say it that way. So it's not confusing. That does not exist. So the methodology can have commonalities to it. The strategy can be sound, but you have, you have to have to have to be free to be able to choose that parts of it does not work for you. And I don't care how expert, the expert is, how influencing the expert is, how influencing the team is, how influencing the leaders are. I don't care what that looks like. Because if you give away a hundred percent of what you know instinctively because you are in the trenches with your business, they are not, If you give that away a hundred percent where you are not trusting your business sense, then you will not have results. The same because your voice, your impact, your presence was meant to show up a different way. And when you come up against this, do remember, do, remember that? It's just something that you need to unravel for you.
(15:30):
It doesn't mean their methodology is wrong, it doesn't mean their strategy is incomplete. It doesn't mean that that you bought into something or invested into something that was not real. It has real components. And I do believe that the majority of people teaching in this space do have validated real components to their program. But there is a part of that program that is unique to them. Just as much as a part of that program is going to be unique for you. And when you're able to identify that piece that you're like, Nope, that doesn't land for me showing up with my marketing doing posts like this, this or this methodology not my jam. Or if they, if there is show up to do marketing and only create it a particular way or follow this type of copywriting or follow this type of prompt or follow this type of x amount of these posts and X amount of those posts and, and this rhythm and, and blah, blah, blah.
(16:39):
If that's the case and it's not resonating with you, don't do it. There's another way out there and you can start splicing these pieces together. You can cherry pick things that work from someone's methodology and then go grab what works some from someone else's methodology and blend it together for your own. And guess what? You organically create a system that works for you. But you have to have that awareness. You have to give yourself the permission and the freedom to trust your own leadership skills, your own business sense, your own gut. I didn't do that for so long. And I can honestly say that it wasn't until this year when I took a break and I stepped into a completely different element of my entrepreneurial journey that I found that I had to strip it all away. I knew, and over the last four years of investing in various programs with various leaders and, and various thinkers, really, really great thinkers, I can honestly go back on my hand count on one hand.
(17:53):
So it's only a few that the people that I have learned certain things from, that a piece of that methodology is true for me. There are a handful that I have learned from that only a small fraction of what I signed up and paid for to learn from them is even something that I'm okay with for my business. And then there are some, none of their methodology is for me and my business. But the beautiful part of that is I checked it out and now I know it's not my jam. It's not how I want to show up in the world. It's not how I'm called to do it. And innately it's not going to be successful. You will not find success if you are not being true to your own voice. Your business has a life, it has its own energy, It has its own spot in this world, and it's meant to make an impact with your voice.
(19:00):
This business of yours is an extension of you, but it cannot be an extension of somebody else's proposition saying, you have to run it this way or you have to do it this way, or you have to build it this way when, Well, let me put a caveat to that. For the creative aspect of it, there are business laws that have to be followed. Absolutely. And obviously when you're a business owner, that's, that is your responsibility to inquire and investigate those. But I'm not here to talk about the specifics of actually legalities on business or track tax requirements or what have you. It's not what it, that's not what this is about. This is about making sure that you can strip away what others claim are the rules that you have inadvertently imposed on yourself to grow your business in your voice, your branding, your copywriting, your course or, or program structure.
(20:18):
The, your value ladder, your marketing. I already say that one. All of those are where you get to be the variable and that variable is what works for you. So as you continue to learn from other experts, do continue to invest in yourself. Do continue to learn bits and pieces as you continue to do that. Remember that no one particular methodology is going to be the sure fit for your business. It's just not, it cannot. But the beautiful part of that is it gives you the power back and the freedom to make decisions and say, you know what? I'd like this person's marketing and I like this person's copywriting. I like this person's teaching and thought process regarding branding. And I like this person's structure on how to put the pieces that I offer my clients together as a value letter or what, what have you. If you wanna even call it a value letter.
(21:37):
That is how you step into the leadership role as a business owner, as an entrepreneur, as a creative, as a powerful force for the voice of change that you intend to or are already bringing to the world. You cannot be a parrot of someone else's methodology and slap your ad lib content on it and hope that it's going to produce what you're looking for. Because the people in this era, this digital age, will smell that, sniff that out a million miles away and it won't go anywhere. It'll just feel like someone else's teaching. But if you are doing that, if, if that is somewhere where you are, I don't want you to be discouraged and in no way, shape, or form is any of my content in this podcast intended to shame or hurt or misalign anyone. I want to crack the door on what's possible for you to go beyond what you're being taught. I wanna crack the door on what's possible when you take the power back in making decisions of this works beautiful. And that does not. And so I'm going to shift to take that power back. I wanna crack the door on you, giving permission to the voice that your content is intended to have. Let it be free.
(23:20):
So strip away, do strip away all of what you've been taught to think that if you ha if you invested, you have to make it work. Because if it doesn't work, then it was a bad investment. That's a money block. Stop, stop. It wasn't, sometimes there is something we are intended to learn that it was going, that that lesson gave us, that, that investment gave us that we didn't even know we needed to learn. Yep, I've had those two. But I want you to be able to know and feel what's possible for you to say that's good for my business. That's not good for my business. Those are the pieces that once you put together and give yourself that power back, you will see your content start to become relevant in a way that you didn't have relevance before. Your content will start to be heard. Your audience will start to grow. You will be able to evolve your, your content for your program in a different manner. Because instead of trying to check the boxes off on how to create something, you allow the flow to come together and all of a sudden pieces fall in place. Whereas you had been stumped before.
(24:55):
I'm not the only one I know that has suffered through trying to make someone else's methodology be the cookie cutter thing that I thought was going to lead my business in the right direction. And I fought, fought this guys so much that I didn't give myself the voice or the freedom or the expression that was necessary that the world needed. I didn't do it. I fought it. And that's where this pulling back, stripping away, eliminating all of the status quo that the experts say you have to do. Pulling back and saying, No, no call to action, no podcast writing content to feel out what feels right for me. Not looking at metrics, much less vanity metrics, not worried about the response or any lack thereof, not building a program. I built a million of them, not really, but close It feels like that I have all of the how to.
(26:10):
I know I know how to build it, I know how to put it together. And so I was able to privileged to be able to step away and let it all go for just a moment to gather myself and say, What is it that I'm not doing? What is it that I am not giving myself permission for? And what is it that I am pulling away from the power that my voice is intended to have in this world? And as I spent time in kind of that solitude of not having to worry about those pieces, all of the, the aspects of my entrepreneurial journey, it was hard then too, even when I didn't have a call to action, even when I wasn't following a methodology, even when I wasn't doing anything in promoting or driving my business, then the head games of, well, maybe you just didn't apply this quite correct, or you didn't give it enough time, or you didn't follow through a hundred percent. Or quit being so picky on liking somebody's, you know, someone's methodology or not. What do you know? Those played a part. But as I walked through that, I allowed those to come up and I allowed those thoughts and I allowed those moments to flow through. I would say if I could give a visual of it at all, I allowed them to be present so that I can work through them. Because if I didn't let them come up, then I wasn't identifying it and I wasn't addressing it.
(27:54):
And as they would come up and if, if an expert's methodology was part of that, or if I would go back and say, You know what? This is the one or that is the one. And I do, like I said earlier in this episode, I do have some then like that's the methodology for that particular thing that works for me a hundred percent. That particular methodology or strategy is sound is what the world needs, but I'm gonna going to apply it at the moment. This expert's process will be the one that I come back to later on when I'm ready for that in my entrepreneurial journey. And later on, maybe a couple days, maybe a couple weeks, maybe a couple months, but do you remember that this digital product world evolved so stink and rapidly? We are on this runaway freight train, it feels like of how quickly these things change, how quickly methodologies shift, how quickly what worked a year ago will not work.
(29:09):
Now we have to be aware of that as well. How much this industry is out of our control. Even as those with buckets of money to invest in their business are looking for ways to circumvent algorithms or pieces that are out of their control. It will never be, it will never be a hundred percent in control, especially when you're coming at it. If, if I, I wouldn't say you, but if someone is an expert in is building it and coming at it with, they are the only way to do it, the impact of the consumer will change the tide for them.
(29:57):
Remember guys, I'll wrap it up. There's no outro, there's no call to action except, except if you find value. If you find value in anything that we talk about inside of the F Nation podcast, it would mean the world to me if you shared that, if you shared a piece of it or a quote from it or the podcast itself as a creator and as you as a creator, having some form of recognition that something's landing doesn't have to be with many, but something's landing is always an indicator that we're onto it somewhere. So do please share.
(30:44):
But your takeaway from this episode is to make sure as you learn from the experts that you are investing in, as you learn from them, you have the freedom and the power and ought to utilize those in order to say parts of the methodology need to be tweaked to be right for you, or parts of the system or strategy need to be adjusted slightly for it to work where you know it should be. And trust that gut guys, you have what it takes to be the leader of your business, but as a leader of your business, you will have to show up as such. And it starts with how we present ourselves in what we create as an impact for others. Until next time, keep moving forward..